By Huw Le Lytle

Last night, shortly after midnight, we finally finished decorating the tree.

I have learnt that humans are considerably less efficient on mulled wine, ginger bread, and Christmas movies. It was quite an epic process this year. A suite in three movements (or three days …).

First, the overture. This movement is largely comprised of the assembly of piles and piles of boxes in the Wreck Room, shrieks of dismay that lights have stopped working, declarations that more lights are needed, and a winding of garland all over the house. The garland number is the kitties’ favourite, as they are especially fond of garland.

The second movement is the danses characteristiques. This involves Deputy and Great Uncle Bulgaria carrying a giant tree through the garden, Great Uncle Bulgaria falling down the garden steps and narrowly missing impaling himself on a Bottlebrush Tree, spectacularly recovering his footing before hitting the ground completely, all in a marvellous display of balletic agility. This number is then followed by Human worrying over and over and filling Great Uncle Bulgaria with treats.

The final movement is the valse des ornements where Human tries to reach the top of the tree balancing on the side of a sofa, Jeff and Howard run away with all the bubble wrap, Howard tries to help by unwrapping ornaments and stashing them behind the sofa, and the kitties sneak in and remove several key pieces overnight and leave them for the delight of Jeff and Howard in the morning.

Christmas. It’s the most wonderful time of the year.