A Be That Dog Christmas Production based on Dr Seuss’s How the Grinch Stole Christmas!
How the Grinch Stole Christmas!
Down in Huw-ville
Liked Christmas a lot …
But the Grinch,
Who lived just north of Huw-ville,
The Grinch hated Christmas! The whole Christmas season!
Now, please don’t ask why. No one quite knows the reason.
It could be his garden glove hands weren’t just right.
It could be, perhaps, that his shoes were too tight.
But I think that the most likely reason of all
May have been that his heart was two sizes too small.
Whatever the reason,
His heart or his shoes,
He stood there on Christmas Eve, hating the Huws,
Staring down from his cave with a sour, Grinchy frown
At the warm lighted windows below in their town.
For he knew every Huw down in Huw-ville beneath
Was busy now, hanging a mistletoe wreath.
“And they’re hanging their stockings!” he snarled with a sneer.
“Tomorrow is Christmas! It’s practically here!”
Then he growled, with his Grinch fingers nervously drumming,
“I MUST find some way to stop Christmas from coming!”
Tomorrow, he knew …
… All the Huw girls and boys
Would wake bright and early. They’d rush for their toys!
And then! Oh, the silly hour! Oh, the Noise! Noise! Noise! Noise!
That’s one thing he hated! The NOISE! NOISE! NOISE! NOISE!
Then the Huws, young and old, would sit down to a feast,
And they’d feast! And they’d feast!
And they’d FEAST!
“Who are you calling old?!”
They would feast on Huw-pudding, and rare Huw-roast-beast
Which is something the Grinch couldn’t stand in the least!
They’d do something
He liked least of all!
Every Huw down in Huw-ville, the tall and the small,
Would play something silly, with squeaky toys ringing,
They’d play and they’d play. And the Huws would start singing!
They’d sing! And they’d sing!
AND they’d SING! SING! SING! SING!
And the more the Grinch thought of this Huw-Christmas-Sing,
The more the Grinch thought, “I must stop this whole thing!
“Why, for what seems like forever I’ve put up with it now!
“I MUST stop this Christmas from coming!
… But HOW?”
Then he got an idea!
An awful idea!
GOT A WONDERFUL, AWFUL, IDEA!
“I know just what to do!” The Grinch laughed in his throat.
And he made a quick Santa Claus hat and a coat.
And he chuckled, and clucked, “What a great Grinchy trick!
“With this coat and this hat, I look just like Saint Nick!”
“All I need is a reindeer …”
The Grinch looked around.
But, since reindeer are scarce, there was none to be found.
Did that stop the old Grinch … ?
No! The Grinch simply said,
“If I can’t find a reindeer, I’ll make one instead!”
So he called his dog, Aubrey. Then he took some red thread
And he tied a big horn on the top of his head.
He loaded some bags
And some old sacks for laundry
On a ramshackle sleigh
And he hitched up young Aubrey.
Then the Grinch said, “Giddap!”
And the sleigh started down
Toward the homes where the Huws
Lay a-snooze in their town.
All their windows were dark. Quiet snow filled the air.
All the Huws were all dreaming sweet dreams without care
When he came to the first little house on the square.
“This is stop number one,” the old Grinchy Claus hissed
And he climbed to the roof, empty bags in his fist.
Then he slid down the chimney. A rather tight pinch.
But, if Santa could do it, then so could the Grinch.
He got stuck only once, for a moment or two.
Then he stuck his head out of the fireplace flue
Where the little Huw stockings all hung in a row.
“These stockings,” he grinned, “are the first things to go!”
Then he slithered and slunk, with a smile most unpleasant,
Around the whole room, and he took every present!
Cheese treats! And squeaky toys! Tugging toys! Bones!
Crunchy toys! Fluffy toys! Blankets! (But no drones!)
And he stuffed them in bags. Then the Grinch, very nimbly,
Stuffed all the bags, one by one, up the chimbley!
Then he slunk to the kitchen. He took the Huws’ feast!
He took the Huw-pudding! He took the roast beast!
He cleaned out that kitchen as quick as a flash.
Why, that Grinch even took their last can of Huw-hash!
Then he stuffed all the food up the chimney with glee.
“And NOW!” grinned the Grinch, “I will stuff up the tree!”
And the Grinch grabbed the tree, and he started to shove
When he heard a small sound like the coo of a dove.
He turned around fast, and he saw a small Huw!
Little Beddie-Blue Huw, who was not more than two. [and some months …]
The Grinch had been caught by this tiny Huw terrier
Who’d heard a noise scary, but the Grinch was much scarier.
He stared at the Grinch and said, “Santa Claus, why,
“Why are you taking our Christmas tree? WHY?”
But, you know, that old Grinch was so smart and so slick
He thought up a lie, and he thought it up quick!
“Why, my sweet little pup,” the fake Santa Claus lied,
“There’s a light on this tree that won’t light on one side.
“So I’m taking it home to my workshop, my dear.
“I’ll fix it up there. Then I’ll bring it back here.”
And his fib fooled the pup. There he patted his head
And he got him a treat and he sent him to bed.
And when Beddie-Blue Huw went to bed with his snack,
HE went to the chimney and stuffed the tree back!
Then the last thing he took
Was the log for their fire!
Then he went up the chimney, himself, the old crook.
On their walls he left nothing but book after book.
And the one speck of food
That he left in the house
Was a crumb that was even too small for a mouse.
He did the same thing
To the other Huws’ houses
Much too small
For the other Huws’ mouses!
It was quarter past dawn …
All the Huws, still a-bed,
All the Huws, still a-snooze
When he packed up his sled,
Packed it up with their presents! The ribbons! The wrappings
The tags! And the tinsel! The trimmings! The trappings!
Three thousand feet up! Up the side of Mt Crumpit,
He rode with his load to the tiptop to dump it!
“Pooh-Pooh to the Huws!” he was grinch-ish-ly humming.
“They’re finding out now that no Christmas is coming!
“They’re just waking up! I know just what they’ll do!
“Their mouths will hang open a minute or two
“Then the Huws down in Huw-ville will all cry BOO-HOO!
“That’s a noise,” grinned the Grinch,
“That I simply MUST hear!”
So he paused. And the Grinch put his hand to his ear.
And he did hear a sound rising over the snow.
It started in low. Then it started to grow …
But the sound wasn’t sad!
Why, this sound sounded merry!
It couldn’t be so!
But it WAS merry! VERY!
He stared down at Huw-ville!
The Grinch popped his eyes!
Then he shook!
What he saw was a shocking surprise!
Every Huw down in Huw-ville, the tall and the small,
Was playing! Without any presents at all!
He HADN’T stopped Christmas from coming!
Somehow or other, it came just the same!
And the Grinch, with his grinch-feet ice-cold in the snow,
Stood puzzling and puzzling: “How could it be so?
“It came without ribbons! It came without tags!
“It came without packages, boxes or bags!”
And he puzzled three hours, till his puzzler was sore.
Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before!
“Maybe Christmas,” he thought, “doesn’t come from a store.
“Maybe Christmas … perhaps … means a little bit more!”
And the Grinch watched the Huws in their silly hour joys.
“These Huws are happy without tinsel and toys.
“Christmas isn’t one day, isn’t two days or four.
For the Huws it’s a home each day evermore.”
And what happened then …?
Well … in Huw-ville they say
That the Grinch’s small heart
Grew three sizes that day!
And the minute his heart didn’t feel quite so tight,
He whizzed with his load through the bright morning light
And he brought back the toys! And the food for the feast!
And he …
… HE HIMSELF …!
The Grinch carved the roast beast!
Merry Christmas from Be That Dog!
Directed by: Human
The Grinch ……………. Deputy
Beddie Blue Huw …… Huw Le Lytle
Max the Dog ………….. Aubrey Beardsley
How How Huw ………. Howard Spring
Jeffervescent Huw …. Jefferson Airplane
A special guest appearance by Brooke’s Blanket as The Christmas Blanket